Gold

Clink. Clink. Clink. I tap my claws gently to the beat against the coins beneath my feet. As I murmor the lyrics, a spray of sparks escapes my lips. "I don't want to set the world on fi-yer..." I sing,  grinning from earhole to earhole over the immense irony of the sentence. I love the Ink Spots. Always have. Much better than some of that 30th century crap the others call music. I suppose I'm just an old-school reptile. Or less new-school, rather. Can't really call something that hasn't happened yet "old-school." "Where is that stupid beast?" I wonder aloud. This, of course, is a rhetorical question, because I know exactly where he is. I know everything. It gets to be a bit of a bore sometimes. Sometimes I wish I were a man...the whole world a mystery, all the answers far beyond my reach. But then I wouldn't have a tail, and that would make balancing an awful pain...Ah! Finally! In stumbles the brute. I laugh as he enters, noticing his resemblance to one of the monsters in Where the Wild Things Are. I've laughed at this many times before, but it's even funnier in person. After a brief introduction, I decide to mess with him a little bit. I feed him some bull shit about existence and the meaning of life, and then just start making stuff up to see if he can follow. He can't. I knew he couldn't. I know everything. Then I explain to him all about the humans and how he drives them to their success; I don't think he fully grasps the concept. He is a dull pupil indeed. Oh well, at least I got a good laugh or two out of his being here. Plus, I got to yell at him about touching my gold. Nothing pleases me more than yelling at people about my gold. Speaking of gold, he should get some gold. I tell him to get some gold. I don't think he grasps the concept. Dumb ass.